LOVE IS A MANY SPLINTERED THING

In a previous blog entry entitled, Times They Are A F***ing Changing, I spoke of a word that seems, over the years, to have taken on a life of its own. The “F” word. Now, I'd like to talk about another word, which in some twisted way has been used as a synonym, but is, or at least should be, very different. The “L” word.

Love.

Love's definitions range from “an intense feeling of deep affection” to “nature's way of tricking people into reproducing.”

Love is a word being much too loosely bandied about, “I love: The Walking Dead, a good bowel movement, oh! and yea, you.

No wonder Cat Stevens said in his song, How Can I Tell You? “How can I tell you that I love you, when I can't think of right words to say.” Saying the right words should be easy, “I love you,” but isn't “love” the same thing you said about the bowl of Borscht you had last night?

(Side Note: Speaking of Cat Stevens, he was really good when he had that name. I don't know much about the Muslim religion, but one thing I've noticed is that after he changed his religion and his name, he couldn't sing for squat. Cat Stevens had some really good music, Yusuf Islam, not so much. If you don't believe me, check out Yusuf's rendition of the Cat Stevens' classic, Peace Train—I hope this note doesn’t get my whole family killed.)

Back to love. We seem, as a society, very willing to change the definition and meanings of words as often as we change our socks. Marriage for example. Let's change the definition of marriage from one man and one women to any two people who love each other. Then let's change the word love from this “ intense feeling of deep affection” to anything opposite of hate or indifference.

TV shows and movies present couples in their 30's so commitment phobic that after a year or more of exclusive dating are finely able to say the words, “I love you.” Dating? I do believe the meaning of that word has also changed from dinners and movies to actually making that word they are unable to say to each other.

There is, unfortunately, a significant difference between making love and being in love. There are many people who can describe making love, but have no clue how to describe being in love. Cat Stevens also has a line in the same song which to me is as good a definition of being in love as any, “Who ever I'm with, I'm always talking to you..” If you have that one person in your life that when you are out alone and see something interesting, you think, “I can't wait to get home and tell....” That's a good indication that person is the one who completes you. It's the one you are always talking to.

It is unfortunate that we have diluted the word love as much as we have because there are few other words that even come close to what love, in its purest definition, means. We have watered down the powerful word love, and we won't ever get its pristine meaning or power back. So, when Cat sings, “I love you, I just can't think of right words to say,” I know what he means.

Love ya' all.