LIFEIN THE REARVIEW MIRROR

My philosophy of life is, “You are born, you die and in between you do something.” While doing that something, you learn something. My posts on this Blog are not attempting to change anybody’s mind. I know I can’t do that, but maybe after my seven decades plus of life experience, I can shed some experiential light on another way to think. Life gives us something to do and I believe a big chunk of my life’s something is giving others something to think about. Think about that.







Wednesday, January 8, 2014

TIMES THEY ARE A F***ING CHANGING

In the new movie, The Wolf of Wall Street, a new record was set. Great you say, an American movie set a new record. Well, wait a f***ing minute. The record is for using the“f word” approximately 525 times. That equals about 3 uses per minute. Does that make you want to see it, want to gag, or does it bother you at all?

The f word, to me, has only two appropriate uses; when describing a particular act, or when you hit your hand with a hammer. Other than those situations, using the f word excessively, to me, is a sign of verbal laziness. If you have a word that can be used as a noun, an adjective, adverb, active/passive/transitive/intransitive verb, interjection and conjunction without really adding any content to the sentence (other than to show just how cool and with it a person you are), I believe that word is a waste of the speaker's and listener's time.

I enjoy comedy and will listen to as many comedy specials as I can. I love giving comics I have not heard of a chance, but as soon as they belittle my intelligence with an f dump, off they go. I realize I am not in the demographics of the young comedians, but this is unfortunate (and to me unexplainable) that it is not just young comedians I have trouble linking up with. I started listening to a special starring Louis Black, who is in his early 60s. He began by saying he had to change venues because the place in which he was originally scheduled to appear nixed his “f this and f that” approach to comedy, and since apparently he can't be funny without f**ing things, he canceled and found a place that would let him adequately express his real character and values. Even comics I really enjoy, like Louis C K, can be a bit off color, but for the brilliance of his observations, I can take it. We watched, I believe an older special of his, and I turned it off after about 15 minutes of “f” fillers, and he dropped a couple of notches on my respect scale.

“My doctor asked me during a physical if I could touch my toes. I told him, “The only way I could touch my toes is if you cut them off and handed them to me.”

This is a joke told by Jim Gaffigan, a comedian who can do a clean hour and is in my estimation a really funny guy. I just wonder how much funnier the joke would have been, how much he could have advanced his career, if he had told it like this.

“F***ing doctor asked me during a physical if I could touch my f***ing toes. I told him, “The only way I could touch my toes is if you f***ing cut them off and handed them to me.”

Was that funnier, or do you feel like taking a shower?

When I began doing public speaking I was told something by an old timer that I have not forgotten. He said that nobody had ever critiqued him for not swearing enough. Words to live by. I maybe completely off base but I can't help, at some level, questioning the intelligence of someone who can't think of a more informative word to covey his or, really unfortunately, her thoughts.

Would anyone be more impressed with:
        Einstein if he has discovered The theory of F***ing Relativity?
        Patrick Henry for shouting out, “Give me Liberty or give me f***ing death”?
        JFK announcing to the world “ Ask not what your f***ing country can do for you-- ask what you can do for your f***ing country?”

I know I sound old, and things have changed, and I have to get with it, but not only does the repetitively meaningless use of the word insult the intelligence of the receiver, but I miss having THAT WORD, the word that could express the ultimate, a word like no other. This word is now being texted by 13 year old girls to describe their f***ing awesome nail polish.

Gosh darn!





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